Life is settling back into normal once again. I’ve unpacked all our clothes, although I am keeping the suitcases close by! It feels really good to know Elizabeth made it one more week in the womb! She is exactly 31 weeks tomorrow.

God is still raining down blessing and provision. Yesterday someone close to our family gave us $1,000 for Elizabeth’s adoption! At this time last week, we needed $11,000. Just since Tuesday alone we have received $9,000. Someone once told us, “Adoption is not about the money.” I really wanted to believe them, but I truly had to see this for myself. I have heard people say before that they would adopt, were it not for the money. I am happy to now report, money is NO EXCUSE! If you have the heart and desire, don’t let fear of money stop you. I have seen God’s provision in our adoption unlike anything ever before. Just last week, I prayed for a gift card from either Target or Wal Mart for those last few baby items that we need. Today’s mail brought a gift card to Target from friends. I had not mentioned my prayer to anyone, not even Jonny.

All these answered prayers make me stop and reflect. I am seeing God show up in a BIG way in our life. Up until last week, when we were so scared about Elizabeth, we had never sought God with such urgency. Not ever. We cried out. He showed up and came through for us. This makes me realize how little I have run to Him with utter dependency all the other days of my life. It shows me how content I am to just settle for a life that is comfortable and works for me.

I wonder what would happen in all our lives if we had the courage to totally abandon our self and pursue the things that really matter to God. Two books I have been reading explore this thought further. They are “Fields of the Fatherless” and “Red Letters” by Tom Davis.

On a different note altogether…. I am posting pictures taken at Zoo Atlanta this morning. Jonathan and I went with Angie and Addie. The weather was sunny yet cool. It was a beautiful day to be outside. We had a great time. I love the sleeping baby panda. She looks so at peace with her world.

Answered Prayer

Today brought about news that is making our hearts sing. We learned that Elizabeth’s heart rate was high yesterday, so the doctors kept Jennifer at the office until it came down. It came down and they think everything is fine with Elizabeth. Also came the news that Jennifer is only TWO centimeters dilated, not four like we were told last week. Since I have never been pregnant, I am having a crash course in what things like dilation and effacement mean. I could drive myself crazy with the questions of how could her dilation have been misread last week, but for now I am just resting in the visible results of answered prayers. Jennifer today is 30 weeks, 4 days along.

Our other wonderful news is that today we received an interest free adoption loan for $5,000!!!!! Just like the manna in the wilderness that God provided daily for the Israelites, He is providing just enough, just in time to keep us moving forward.

I really don’t think I’ll ever want to skydive. This adoption has felt like hurling ourselves out into the open, praying our parachute opens as we fly. It is enough of a rush to last quite a while, I assure you.

Nearly Undone

I spoke with our social worker about Jennifer’s appointment with her OB GYN. The social worker heard from Jennifer only briefly before their phone conversation was interrupted. Somehow, they never connected anymore during the day. All the information we have is that Elizabeth’s heart rate is 185.

I don’t really know what to think at this point. I am trying not to give into the fear that is threatening to knock me over and pin me down. A friend reminded me that perfect love casts out fear. Please pray for me to have peace. And please pray for more information to come our way tomorrow.

On a lighter note, I have had sitting on my pantry shelf for a few days a box of Dove chocolates. It was supposed to be a gift for a friend in Florida. I didn’t get to see her on our trip down last week. I was just going to save it for our next trip down. Well, with all the stress, I have been thinking about that chocolate and wanting to rip into it so bad. I finally did just that. Each peace of chocolate is wrapped in foil with a dove promise printed on the inside. The wrapper above is from my first piece of chocolate. I think God is trying to tell me what my friend reminded me of earlier: fear not the path I choose for you. I am with you. There’s no need to panic.

Today passed with no news other than our agency’s social worker telling me that she saw Jennifer, and Elizabeth has dropped noticeably since Friday. My heart is in my throat. I want Elizabeth to stay in the womb as long as possible. And there is also a part that wants so badly to face head on whatever is in store for us and Elizabeth. I just wish I knew when she is coming, and the outcome so I can be prepared. But there is no way to know ahead of time. Jennifer is in good spirits and feeling well. We are very thankful for this.

Tomorrow Jennifer has an appointment with her OB GYN. I am not sure what I am anticipating, but I found myself squeezing each moment of today for all it is worth. I rocked Jonathan a little longer than usual before bedtime. I savored extra moments of play with him. I spent extra time talking with Jonny about his classes, our life, and our future. I guess I was just embracing the normal things I take so for granted on a daily basis.

If I didn’t believe in a God who orchestrates every detail of our lives, I would be sick with worry. Our situation shows me yet again how we have NO control whatsoever over the outcome of life events. I am so prone to forgetting that. To exert my own feeble attempts of control. It just doesn’t work.

Now for some wonderful news! Adoption, as many of you know, is a leap of faith. We kind of plunged into this one as we do not have the funds we need in order to complete it. Some would consider this foolish. Others would say this is faith. I have moments where I think I am in both camps at once! Anyway, we have been applying to numerous adoption loan agencies who offer interest free loans for couples who are adopting but lack the resources to pay all the costs up front. We are still waiting on the outcome from 2 agencies. This afternoon, we received word that a group of Christian businessmen and women who have heard of our situation are donating $3,000 for Elizabeth’s adoption!!!!!! This is so timely too! When things are not all smooth sailing, I am prone to think we have made a wrong decision or misread the guidance of God. I feel He is showing us He is going to provide all we need to bring Elizabeth home. Please rejoice with us!

Aren’t these amazing pictures of our baby girl? I love technology! These pictures came about through something rather frightening we experienced over the last 48 hours.

We got a phone call Thursday morning telling us Jennifer was in labor and we were advised to travel to Florida immediately. We did so. Friends and family prayed heavily for our situation, and the doctors were able to stop Jennifer’s labor later that afternoon. Hence, our 4-D sonogram photos. The doctors estimate Elizabeth as being 12 inches long and weighing 2 pounds, 14 ounces. Jennifer is 4 cm dilated and 50% effaced. It is critical that Elizabeth remain in Jennifer’s womb for as long as possible. The doctors released Jennifer Friday morning and we were able to meet her for the first time. We found her to be loving, warm and ready to embrace us into her life. Please pray for her to have peace as we all wait to see what develops from here. We arrived home after midnight this morning.

It has been a very emotional 48 hours and we are still recovering from it all. The fear and uncertainty of Elizabeth coming so early is driving us closer to God. No matter the outcome, we love and want Elizabeth. Events like these show us the stuff our faith is made of. I was faltering a lot on the drive home. I kept thinking, maybe this isn’t the right thing for us to be doing after all. If it were the right thing, why would it be so hard? At that moment, Focus on the Family came on the radio. James Dobson was interviewing Steven Curtis Chapman about how his family received God’s call to adopt their first daughter from China. Every word affirmed God’s heart for the most vulnerable of human beings on earth: children. Elizabeth is a child made in the image of God. An eternal soul indwells her body. Her life is worth fighting for. James Dobson ended the interview with a word of encouragement to anyone who was considering adoption: “Just do it. Make it happen.” It was the pep talk I needed before the fight of our life. Please pray that Jennifer’s water will NOT break and that Elizabeth will not come for at least two more weeks.

We enjoyed a relaxing weekend. Jonny had the weekend off from work and school, something that never happens. We went to the park on Saturday and it was great to have family time.

Jonathan is growing up so fast. This past week he has added a lot of new words to his vocabulary. Cute and cool are two of his new words. I guess he hears us using them a lot… especially in reference to himself! It is quite scary to have such a talented mimic who watches our every action and listens to our every word.

He also loves to help me out around the house. Whenever I am working in the kitchen, he pulls up his stool to the counter and tries to help. He really likes to stir things. He helped me with laundry the other day. I showed him how to hang a t-shirt on a hanger and he did one all by himself! I love having him at this age. I love how he chatters about everything. Children are so much fun!

Princess time!

Last night my friend Angie and her two daughters came over to play. Savannah is 4 and Addie is 2. Jonathan was all smiles the whole time the girls were here. My camera was on the blink, so the pictures are not the best. But, I just had to share them anyway. Jonathan played Cinderella's prince for the first time in his life. Angie was the clock at midnight. When she chimed, Savannah, the Cinderella of the evening, glided around the living room until her shoe fell off. "Oh, no my slipper!" she cried. We showed Jonathan how to pick up her shoe, place it on a pillow and carry it over to Savannah. He was too cute trying to wiggle it onto her foot! Very adorable and he thought all this princess stuff was kind of fun afterall! I think it is good practice for years to come with having a sister. The pictures are of the 3 of them just having fun and being silly.

My men

Breakfast with daddy is the right way to start the day!

Jonny was editing a sermon this week and Jonathan decided to join him on the couch. Markers and a coloring book are appropriate tools to dig into the Word as well, right?

Florida bound soon

I just spoke with our social worker at our adoption agency. Today our birthmom Jennifer went to her doctor for a routine pregnancy appointment. She is doing great, and so is Elizabeth. Jennifer is 28 weeks along. Everything is right on schedule!

Here's the best part: Jennifer's last sonogram is on August 22 and she wants us to come down and meet her then and be present at the sonogram too! Isn't that just too wonderful? We are really excited about meeting her and are so thankful for the opportunity of spending a little time with her. I am not sure I can ever convey how much this gift means. Being present, seeing Jennifer's tummy swollen with the life of our yet to be born daughter, seeing Elizabeth on the screen... it is such a gift to us.

August 7, 2002

Six years ago today, Jonny popped THE question to me! We drove to Marietta square for Italian, then walked across to the park after dinner. Under the softly glowing lamplight, Jonny whispered in my ear that he loved me and then asked me to be his wife. I said yes immediately, and he slipped our engagement ring on my finger. I think my eyes were shining as much as my diamond! Time has accelerated greatly since that moment. But the one thing that is as true today as then... I love my husband more than anything in the world. He is so patient and tender and affectionate with me. He loves God and His Word and seeks to lead our growing family with humility and integrity. I did not imagine six years ago that Jonny would be in seminary right now and preparing for a deployment to Afghanistan next year. I did not imagine that I would ever listen to him preach in church. I did not imagine that the depth of knowing him would grow ever so sweeter with each passing day. I did not imagine how satisfying a life with him would be. I am thankful that my life with my husband has exceeded anything I could have ever imagined. I love you, Jonny! I am so proud to be your wife. You mean the world to me.

Zoo!

We are so thankful for our yearly passes to Zoo Atlanta. They allow us to enjoy animals from many other continents which we otherwise would never see. Jonathan likes the zoo a lot. I am not sure what his favorite animal is yet!